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Initiative.
| The Conductor - Solf J Kimblee - is dead. You've won. You have three new keys, a philosopher's stone, and twenty-three mysterious potions at your disposal. You've had enough of people leading you around, haven't you? So now it's your turn to take initiative. What will you do now? |
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[...Glances up, for a moment. Then back down.]
I... I don't think those things we said back then... I'm not really keen on holding to it. [...] Can't very well grow to forgive you if I can't look at you. You know?
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[ She looks over at Ashley, just for a second. Sees the scar poking out from her beanie. A nice, wide circle. The gun she held to her head point-blank.
She looks away again. ]
I sure as hell don't.
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I do. I can't not, no matter how much I try. And I already told you. I'm not okay leaving it like this anymore.
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[ That's enough for her to look back up at her. Adjust the red hat she's wearing on top of her head a bit.
But honestly... ]
I...don't want to leave it like this, either. It's selfish of me. But I...the idea of not speaking to you again...
[ It leaves a bad feeling in the pit of her gut. ]
I would miss your company.
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And I'm pretty selfish too, remember? C'mon.
[...Not a hug offered, but- high five?]
Hit me. Go ahead.
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[ This is a lot easier than a hug. She gives her the best damn high-five she could, the latex of her plugsuit colliding with Ashley's hand with a satisfying smack. ]
You do know what's coming next, though. You said it yourself, when you were drunk off your ass. You're gonna get out of here. You're gonna see him again. He's gonna be alive. You're gonna tell him that you love him. And you're gonna get that motherfucking happily ever after if we have to pry it out of Kimblee's cold, dead hands.
You got that?
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Ohhh, now that you know I remember all that, you are neeever going to let me live it down, are you? [Literally the most embarrassing drunk possible.]
...I know. It's all...it'll be okay. If I could get out of this alive...then they're all there, waiting for me. I... Chris is waiting for me.
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[ She'll just have to get Asuka to have a few drinks in retaliation when they get out of here, as long as it's not one of those disgusting black beers again. ]
...He'll be right there for you when you get back.
[ And unlike the last time she reassured Ashley, her first thought when she says that isn't that she's lying to her. No, Asuka seems...fairly convinced of that, herself. Not being optimistic. Just...something tells her that's the case. ]
Trust me on that one, okay?
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What a funny feeling, so light and...beautiful. What has to be waiting for her, imagining his face when he learns she's alive... There's never been something more wonderful.]
You know what? I do. I trust you.
[...]
Keep on fighting. When you go back...you don't need me to tell you, but keep on fighting, for your own...something. Something good.
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She winces, but...she's going to make this right.
She pulls Ashley in by their linked hands, and gives her a hug. And as bad as she is at the physical contact thing, there's something urgent about her motion, as if there's no way for her to convey the sentiment she wants to get across unless she does this. ]
...I won't give you a reason not to trust me again.
I'm sorry.
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The first time, an apology felt cheap- of course it did, it'd happened during the murder. And after they died, it all felt wrong, incomplete.
Now...
Well. From the way Ashley holds her, it's definitely different, this time. Soft. Gentle.] I'm holding you to that.
And I... I forgive you.
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[ Asuka...really can't contain her smile when she hears that. The sound she makes is something that sounds a bit strangled, like a sob...but she's grinning from ear to ear, and she's holding Ashley close to her, and...
When she speaks next, it's quiet, and though she knows not to ruin the atmosphere... ]
I...may be a fucked up mess, and I may be bad at this, but, thank you for being patient with me. I...Just. Thank you. For caring, like you do.
...
.......
E-even if you don't know what the fuck you're talking about when it comes to Harry Potter.
1/2
...But this. Right here, right now. They're alive and fucked up and so full of goddamn opportunities and everything Ashley is saying she means from the bottom of her heart and it's got her so happy she can hardly stand it.
Getting burned by a friend, it's not the end. It's not a definitive cut-off. That's a good feeling, to know that, from both ends.]
You're wel--
2/2 fuckign
I'm a Harry Potter master, you damn simplistic fool of a Slytherdor.
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The feeling that she has when she's with her isn't just a worthless throwaway. It's something with substance. Something worth feeling. A hell of a lot better than the emptiness she's used to.
Asuka may not deserve forgiveness, but Ashley certainly deserves a lot. ...So she won't disappoint her. ]
A Slytherdor? Is that really a thing? What the heck does that make you, a Gryffinclaw?
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That's what matters most.
A lighthearted snort.] What? Oh no, I'm a Ravenclaw to my core, thank you very much! Mostly people use those if they identify more with one house or another, but there's this really in-depth way of sorting people have figured out, with a primary house and a secondary house.
Your primary is what matters most to you, the way you look at the world. It's your morals, in whatever way they are. As a Slytherin primary, you're driven by ambition, but what matters most is you and what and who you see as yours- not exactly a bad way of looking at things.
The secondary is how you go about things! Gryffindor secondaries are honest and brash and meet their challenges head-on, bold!
...Of course, you prioritize knowledge too, so maybe you could be a Ravenclaw secondary instead. I'm not sure.
[she's doing the thing where she won't shut up again-]
I got into this kind of sorting and can't stop. [Oops.]
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I suppose you are mostly Ravenclaw...but I do think you have qualities of all of them. I just said Gryffindor because I think you're courageous, too, but considering how much of a goddamn nerd you are...yeah, Ravenclaw's a perfect fit for you.
But you're also...patient and kind, and loyal to the people you call your friends. So you have Hufflepuff in you, too. ...With a touch of resourcefulness, and self-preservation. Thus, Slytherin, too.
As for myself, yeah, I'm a Slytherin to a T. ...I mean, no way in hell green is my color, but, even so. And smart as I am, I'm probably closer to a Gryffindor than I am to a Ravenclaw. ...And you'd have to be crazy to think I'm a fucking Hufflepuff.
So, yeah. Spot-on.
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Well... I guess there is a bit of that in me...but that's kind of the point, isn't it? Everyone has a bit of everything...but it's what you value, what's important to you that determines where you go, in the end.
[A nice emotional conversation capped by Harry Potter, ain't this just like them?]
...Huh. I said I'd never understand you, but... [This feels nice, doesn't it?]
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[ She doesn't think there's much more to it than that. ]
And I'm...starting to change the way I think. Just a bit. This place kind of turned me around. ...Doing things the way I was doing them wasn't exactly getting me anywhere, as much as I hate to admit it. I don't know if this is going to get me anywhere, either. But...
It's a second chance. To go along with an earlier metaphor of ours, it's not quite a "reload from an old save" as much as it is that we had a "0 life" the whole time. ...So I want to do things differently, before we game over again.
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[Those other Ashleys, those other worlds, the choices she made differently... They're important. But they're not her.]
...I'm glad that you're giving this a try. This...new thing. I bet- you'll get something out of it, Asuka. Something good. I know you will.
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[ "Mama, please, I'm begging you, Mama, please don't stop being my mother..." ]
And...we can't let our phantoms define us.
I'm going to become stronger than I ever could have been by myself. ...And you're going to watch me, Ashley.
We're getting happy endings, if I have anything to say about it.
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...Somehow. They found a way to survive this. They'll find a way to do that too.]
Exactly. We'll move forward and...and make life better, however we have to. You...and me. Both of us. [There we go. Good job, Asuka.
Congratulations.]
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[ "Asuka..."
"Mama..?"
"
Come to Heaven wiYou mustn't die! You must live! You're alive!"... ]
...We'll just have to do it together.
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