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Week 2.
Two people are dead. Ken Kaneki has been murdered, Reaver has been executed - and perhaps most uncomfortably, the Conductor is proud of you all for adhering to due process. (As always, by which he means that there is a process, and you all are certainly doing it.) Saturday is given to regrouping and sleep; come Sunday morning, the clock chimes the hour at seven o'clock and there are no dead bodies to be found, so it can be assumed that all of you are safe for the time being. That said, you'll be feeling a little groggy when you wake up; it seems you've regained something that you didn't realize you'd lost... However, once you've shaken that off, there are new things to be looked at; the previously closed-off area near the kitchen has been unlocked, and there's a new floor to be explored - consider it your reward for a job well done. |
SUNDAY | MONDAY | TUESDAY | WEDNESDAY | THURSDAY
[OOC: Welcome to week two of Trustfell! Save your threads for coins and the coming week's activity check; don't forget to check in to this week's activity check and submit your memory regains as well!
The Letters and Switchboard posts are still active, for the sake of contacting the jerk who's keeping you here, to be used at your leisure!]
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[ Asuka shakes her head. The world is full of sick fucks. ]
It's not fucked up to be glad that you're alive. Survivor's guilt. That's what you're feeling right now, isn't it?
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[A choked laugh.] God, what the hell.
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[ Asuka's no good at this whole consoling thing at all. But she'll put a hand on the shoulder on her good side, if nothing else. ]
Fate has it out for you. ...Make sure you tell it to go fuck itself, one way or another.
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She hugs her, quick and sudden.]
Thank you. Really. Thank you.
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[ Asuka can't remember the last time someone actually wrapped their arms around her. It has to have been years. And she definitely can't remember the last time she's hugged someone back. Ever since she's been like this, ever since she started hurting, feeling angry, feeling apathetic down to her core...
She hasn't felt someone embrace her in a long time. And normally, she would be quick to dismiss someone trying to wrap their arms around her. Hell, she'd probably throw them over her goddamn shoulder, for thinking they have the right to so much as lay a finger on her. But the fact that this is all happening so fast, that she had almost forgotten what it feels like to have someone so much as fucking hug her, that Ashley's been through so much shit...
Asuka doesn't push her away. She stands there, rigid like a stone wall, just letting Ashley hold her for now, despite the fact that holding Asuka close like this is obviously injuring herself...
It reminds Asuka of something she read about, something she studied in university. The Hedgehog's Dilemma, they called it. Porcupines want to get close to each other to share heat during the winter. But getting close means being hurt by the sharp spines on their back. So they keep their distance, staying only so close that they get just enough heat to get by...of course, though, they don't get pricked by the spines.
Ashley feels physical pain right now. Asuka feels needles.
She mumbles, under her breath, almost as if she's saying it to herself, to a voice inside her head... ]
Verpiss dich.
[ "It's not like you."
"Not like me?"
"Being happy...doesn't suit you."
"The happy me...is scary. So I'll go back to the usual me."
She thought she was done caring. ]
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The tingling stabs on her skin don't matter; in her last memory before waking up, Chris held her close as they staggered out into the cold together, away from Josh's bisected body. When she woke this morning, that little comfort was so horribly ripped away. Not again. Even if Asuka won't hug her back. Even if it's strange and awkward.]
...
[But, she should let go, eventually. Unwrap herself, despite the voice in her head pleading to stay there, just a few seconds longer. She hopes- maybe, some of this is helping Asuka as it is her; Ashley's not the only one who's had a horrible, mind-soaking memory emerge, after all. With that one last little prayer, Ashley pulls back. She'd squeeze Asuka's shoulder, if her hands weren't full of supplies to take care of her foolishly self-inflicted wounds.]
...Thank you.
[Just once more, for good measure, soft as can be. This is supposed to be a trust exercise, isn't it? That's what the Conductor's rules say. Despite the virtual Hell she's been through, it's nice to have found someone that fits that -- trust.]
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[ Asuka is still just a bit floored. She needs to collect herself, to think, to breathe, to be alone. This place is fucking with her, of that fact she is completely and utterly convinced; she didn't quite realize it was to this magnitude. Ashley lets go of her, and it still takes Asuka a few moments to shake her head, to come out of her trance... ]
Sorry. I'm...not much of a hug person.
[ She gives Ashley a shrug, not quite looking her in the eye, not certain where to go from here or what to say...and she hates every second of it. Every second where she isn't in control of her situation, where she doesn't have a complete understanding of what's going on and how she should deal with it...
She can feel the puncture wounds. See the barbs pointed inward, closing in on her by the second. Forming bonds with others...that's what it is, to her. ]
You understand.
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I do. It's okay.
[And what now? It's late... Past curfew by now, probably.]
I should, probably, get this stuff on, right? So...
[Should they part ways now? ...Ashley thinks maybe she can handle that.]
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I'm gonna head to the library. See if there isn't anything in there that's useful. Right now I'm finding a whole lot of nothing, but...
[ She shakes her head and lets her hair tousle over her shoulders. She's not sleeping anytime soon. ]
I'll let you know if something turns up. You just take care of yourself for now.
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...If you need me, you know where to find me.