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Week 2.
Two people are dead. Ken Kaneki has been murdered, Reaver has been executed - and perhaps most uncomfortably, the Conductor is proud of you all for adhering to due process. (As always, by which he means that there is a process, and you all are certainly doing it.) Saturday is given to regrouping and sleep; come Sunday morning, the clock chimes the hour at seven o'clock and there are no dead bodies to be found, so it can be assumed that all of you are safe for the time being. That said, you'll be feeling a little groggy when you wake up; it seems you've regained something that you didn't realize you'd lost... However, once you've shaken that off, there are new things to be looked at; the previously closed-off area near the kitchen has been unlocked, and there's a new floor to be explored - consider it your reward for a job well done. |
SUNDAY | MONDAY | TUESDAY | WEDNESDAY | THURSDAY
[OOC: Welcome to week two of Trustfell! Save your threads for coins and the coming week's activity check; don't forget to check in to this week's activity check and submit your memory regains as well!
The Letters and Switchboard posts are still active, for the sake of contacting the jerk who's keeping you here, to be used at your leisure!]
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I apologize. I cannot imagine how you must feel about what happened to his sisters.
[...]
His death... It sounds as though it was gruesome. May I ask what happened to him?
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[Her hands are clenched very tight in her lap. Still, she stares at the floor.]
Chris told me not to look, but I- when he got me down, I still...saw what was left.
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...Or maybe she was taken from the middle of it.]
I'm so sorry. I don't have enough words to express how upset I am that something like that happened to you.
[He's trying to be sympathetic and it's... sort of working. His expression and voice are still a bit stiff, but Logan's never been very good at expressing himself.]
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Right before, we'd had a séance, the three of us. Josh wanted to. He said he used to do it with...with Hannah and Beth all the time, so...of course... I was asking the questions and we...I think we talked with Hannah, but he thought I was just...faking, and he got upset and went off on his own. Next time I even heard him, he was screaming, so...I tried to see if he was okay, and.
[No more words. It looks like that's all, isn't it? She talked so much last night with Asuka, so much more detail, but...no. Not right now. Not anymore.]
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I cannot imagine what that was like.
[He's familiar with screams and sometimes that's all his nightmares are filled with, but--]
Losing your friend in such a horrible, gruesome way... That never should have happened to you. I'm so sorry, Ashley.
[There should be something more he can do to help her, but Logan has no idea what it is. He normally doesn't comfort people. He's never needed to.]
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You too. You... If you don't want to it's okay, but-
[Now, finally, she does look up.]
No one should...lose a friend in such a horrible way.
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...Four years ago I was in a terrible situation. I came back a completely different person. Everything terrified me and I could barely keep myself together for long enough to return to the castle. I couldn't tell anyone about what I had experienced though; no one would believe me.
I remained locked up in the castle and refused to see anyone for quite some time. Reaver barged into the War Room one day and refused to leave until I told him what had happened. He was not kind, but he was understanding and he was able to help me get back on my feet. I still had a country to run and now, a country to save.
...Even before that, Reaver was close to my mother. They fought together fifty years ago and I've known Reaver my entire life. I didn't get to know him very well until I was a teenager. I spent a good amount of time fighting beside him and after I became king he was often in the castle. Reaver has been a fixture in my life for a very long time.
[All of that is delivered without much emotion, though Logan's hands are shaking.]
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Reaver is someone who Ashley had just met- someone who didn't seem to respect her, who made her uncomfortable, who was willing to get her killed in the end. ...But. To Logan, he was more than that. To Logan, he was what he'd needed.
It's something she can't fully understand, nor accept...but what she can understand is he lost someone. Oh, she can understand that far too well now.]
And without him, it's... Nothing fits. [Josh drunk, crying, screaming for his sisters, the part of his life that made sense, and she never followed up on that did she?] ...It's not fair. Not fair that we're here, that you're...going through this.
Nothing's fair.
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[But he's fully aware that that's not true. The Dark Seal scared Reaver and that... that was terrifying. He's never seen Reaver freak out like that. Then there was the trial... Reaver's greatest fear was death, wasn't it?]
...You're right. Nothing fits. Even if I return to Albion - even if I find some way to save everyone - nothing will ever be right again. I sacrificed him so I could live. That is never a decision I wanted to make.
["You have the power over life and death. Now choose."
He has no idea what exactly he's feeling, but it's some hideous combination of fury and sorrow and pain and he hasn't allowed himself to feel this much since directly after the trial. He can't do this, he can't afford to do this, not while they're stuck in here.]
...I apologize. It's not my intention to dwell on my issues. You have been through so much - much more than anyone should ever have to face. I'm sorry, Ashley.
[By the time he's done with all of this it's not just his hands shaking anymore. Logan's voice is still controlled, but he can't look at her.]
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N-no. I said- I said you could, remember? I- this is what I should've done then. With you a-and...with Josh. [Avoiding him. Apologizing and going through Chris, for weeks and weeks and God how much did she need to grow a backbone?]
If I can do anything here, I hope it's listen. It's okay, because- I can't pretend to be okay a-and I don't think you can either.
[It feels like there's lead in her bloodstream, keeping her there in that chair. Hands still clenched, mind still serenaded by Josh's dying screams. It's okay. Because it's not okay, it will probably never be okay ever again, and she has to accept that, the both of them do.]
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Ultimately he can't. He can't and he feels like a coward for being unable to face it.]
...Yes. Of course. I cannot talk to everyone here, nor would I want to, but at the very least I can confide in you.
[But that... That's too much pressure, isn't it? Logan shakes his head.]
I apologize. I will not always unload all of my problems on you. There are others I can talk to as well. I will always do my best to listen to you as well, Ashley. You have been through something horrific that I cannot even begin to imagine, but at the very least I can listen and attempt to be here for you.
[He'll try not to fuck this up like he did with his sister. There's no way he could fuck up that badly again.]
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But damn if she's not going to try and do something, unlike with Josh. It's not too late to do something right.]
A- a little bit at a time, then? That sounds like a good deal, Logan.
[At last she lets her hands relax, though it's mostly so they can find comfort on her arms.]
I'll help when I can, and...thank you. For...listening.
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[He's quiet for a moment before running a hand back through his hair. He doesn't look agitated though, just tired.]
Unfortunately, this situation makes it nearly impossible to have time to heal from what has happened to us. I'm doing what I can to keep myself busy and that helps. Perhaps it will work for you as well. I am not saying to ignore what happened to you, but trying to keep your mind off of it will help.
[Maybe. He's been doing a lot of "ignoring what happened to him" but you know what, he tried to give halfway decent advice. He's bad at this.]
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[There will be literally no argument from her. She sighs heavily and her shoulders slump a bit more.]
Not exactly in a healthy, healing environment here. I think...finding a way to not think about it would be good. Between the library and the sewing room...no, don't worry, this won't be...100% feelings hour.
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You too, Logan.