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Week 3.
Two more people are dead. Byakuren Hijiri has been murdered and Undyne has been executed. That brings us up to four deaths and twenty-five remaining Participants. You're doing well. Take all of Saturday to rest and sleep. You've earned it. On Sunday morning, the clock chimes the hour at seven o'clock. With no more bodies to be discovered, it seems you're safe for the time being. That said, you'll be feeling a little groggy when you wake up; it seems you've remembered something else. Or was that another really bizarre dream? Like last week, there's a new floor to explore. A reward for your efforts, of course. There's something else new, however, and as you approach the foyer you might hear the beautiful sound of... chickens? Chickens. Those are definitely chickens. It looks like Tabby's petition has worked, you have chosen chickens. Perhaps even more important are the rule changes, effective immediately. You might want to take note of them. |
SUNDAY | MONDAY | TUESDAY | WEDNESDAY | THURSDAY
[OOC: Welcome to week three of Trustfell! Save your threads for coins and the coming week's activity check; don't forget to check in to this week's activity check and submit your memory regains as well!
The Letters and Switchboard posts are still active, for the sake of contacting the jerk who's keeping you here, to be used at your leisure!]
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I knew him for a week and I miss him. I can't imagine what it must be like to lose someone who's been there your whole life.
[ When she says it, it sounds so painful to someone who's spent most of her life alone. How do you recover from a thing like that? ]
How do you manage?
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[Logan shakes his head, but apparently the floodgates have been opened, because he speaks up again.]
I spend the majority of my nights awake, replaying that trial and trying to find some way to prevent that from happening. I shouldn't have said anything. I condemned him, I asked him to confess... Everything I did was selfish. I wanted to remain alive. I wanted to be angry at him, so it wouldn't hurt as badly when he died. I thought I could handle it... and I have never been more wrong in my life.
[His hands are shaking a bit, but he's trying very hard not to show it.]
He supported me during the worst moment of my life and I... I turned my back on him. I let him die. I know there wasn't another option, but... There must have been something else I could have done.
no subject
She's been an idiot. ]
Logan!
[ It comes out with more emotion than she'd wanted, but it's done, it's out there, and she has to push forward, for the both of them. Her own hands shaking slightly, Youko moves to cup his cheeks - first one hand, then the other. She means to move them as slowly as she did last time, but there's an urgency she can't fully suppress. ]
You didn't turn your back on him. What you did was not sentence 27 people to death. Do... do you really think you wouldn't feel just as badly, if you had to live with that?
...You weren't being selfish then. But aren't you being selfish now? [ There's no harshness behind her words, just an upset tone and a weak smile. ] If you'd done anything else, all of us would be dead - not just you. The children. Me. And because you'd be dead, you wouldn't even have to suffer your actions. You'd be free.
I told him... I told him I thought failure would end in punishment. He still acted. You didn't do anything wrong, Logan. He did.
[ fuck damnit, reaver. ]
no subject
...I couldn't sacrifice everyone for him. I know that. But I could take no comfort in that fact. That's...
[Disgusting.]
I knew most people would not be convinced to spare him. Six million lives... there was no way for anyone to know if he was lying. If I was lying as well. Using them as a shield like that... I would normally find that horrible. But he was right. Without him, Albion doesn't stand a chance.
[...]
He spoke to me about that as well. Only someone rash would act immediately without knowing the stakes... He agreed with me. He made it sound like there was nothing stupider. But then he...
I don't know if he lied to me or if he changed his mind at some point. Perhaps I could have prevented that if I had... I don't know. I don't know and I'll never know. There's so much I never asked him; there's so much I never said. I... I never thanked him, for...
[Logan is shaking and he tries to pull back. He's not sure he wants to be touched right now, because he's always recoiled in on himself when he's messed up by something. He shuts everyone out - that's just what he does.
Reaver was the only person willing to barge in and force him to talk.]
no subject
No. Not happening. Youko wouldn't let him. She hasn't stopped shaking, but Youko's grip tightens and she tilts his head so he has to look directly at her. ]
No! I wouldn't have let you! I still knew what I knew, remember?! So...
[ Here they go. The real reason she waited for him after that trial; why she made sure they spoke. ]
Any responsibility lies with me as well!
no subject
I... I know. That doesn't make this any easier.
[It would have made things worse for her if she'd had to draw attention to Reaver. So it's better this way.]
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The person you're beating up is my friend. So stop hurting him already!
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I... I'm sorry.
[That's a genuine apology, though it sounds kind of confused.]
I'll... try to stop. I hadn't realized...
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That's right! When you hurt, I hurt too, you know!
[ ...youko that sounds like a bit more than friendship, uh ]
So look after yourself! Be nicer, and more forgiving! And don't just try to hide it harder so that I can't see, because I will and I'll know!
[ -You know what, she's going to tug Logan down closer to her level using whatever leverage she's got from holding his face in her hands, and
lightly plunk her forehead against his and leave it there ]
Got it?
no subject
I...
[TRYING SO HARD NOT TO LOOK AWAY]
...I will. You've been able to see right through me better than anyone else here.
[Except for possibly Reaver, but Reaver literally knew him his entire life, so uh.]
no subject
[ Youko sounds honestly confused there, because uh ]
But that's- don't take this the wrong way, but... [ what's a non-shitty way to say he's like an open book? ...if only to her, apparently...? ] Well, that just means they're not trying hard enough! And they should! Because you're worth it!
...So I'm glad you'll take better care of yourself from now on. That's good.
no subject
Youko, I have been attempting to prevent anyone from knowing exactly what I'm feeling since I was a teenager. A king who shows weakness is not someone the people can rely on. At best I will be taken advantage of; at worst they will revolt.
[It would be a shame if the monarchy crumbled because he couldn't stop that from happening. So. Ridiculously stoic all the time, then.
...To be fair he's also naturally like this, so it wasn't much of a stretch.]
Perhaps it is not the right way to go about it, but I prefer it when people are not aware of exactly what I'm feeling. It isn't that they aren't trying hard enough, it is that I have had plenty of time to find a way to present myself as being able to handle everything.
[Even though it's usually a matter of not handling anything.]
no subject
[ ...Huh. But she thinks she gets it?? Maybe??? ]
So... it really is just that I'm good at this? Well.
[ Have a cheeky grin for your troubles. ]
I suppose I can live with that.
[ Her grin looks sort of proud, to tell the truth. ]
I won't lie - the thought of having a rare talent, it's nice!
no subject
[He looks sort of pleased by that, alright.]