The world is all one! Unity mind!

[brandnewday]

[Another week, another set of disasters. Hibiki’s head is still reeling from the lengthy ordeal that was Solf J. Kimblee. But it’s because of that exasperation that she’s able to turn her restlessness into something useful. It’s too late to set about making curry for everyone, so it’s time to make some easier dishes. A replication of Fern’s mac-and-cheese, somehow she’s whipped up some kind of donut to go with her animal-shaped rice balls. There’s coffee, tea...hopefully it’s enough? And if it’s not, Rin has provided some delicious Chinese food. And that always tastes better late at night, doesn’t it?

And for the adults (or the exasperated teenagers), Susan is carting down booze from the bar. Joy. Hibiki’s never written to the group en masse before, but she delivers a piece of paper to everyone while Rin and Susan finish up the preparations. Each paper has a drawing of an animal on it, too.]

Too much has happened today. Whether you want to get angry, cry, smile, laugh, or just be out of your room, you don’t have to do it alone. Rin and I have prepared food for everyone, and Susan’s brought the drinks downstairs so none of us have to go into the bar tonight.

Even if it’s just for a little while, won’t you think about joining us in the dining room tonight? Being together is just as important as working hard. And remember, nankurunaisa!

-Hibiki Ganaha

[Three more candles are lit today. Tabitha Smith. Sigrun Eide. Solf Kimblee. They’re all Cabanela’s doing. There aren't any decorations, but the food is spaced out so everyone should be able to grab something and munch if they need it. It’s not clear how many people will come, but a serious attempt was made this time.]

Comments

[sleepytimegal]

Of course. I was just- it was a stupid question.

[ Stupid, in a way. But the desire Blue mentioned made sense, with how Rin was talking before. ]

[heritrix]

...it's not a stupid question. [Rin doesn't want Alex to feel like that.] That's the sort of thing to ask, when you hear someone could have gotten you killed. It's strange you're beating yourself up about it, and not me.

[She's surprised Alex hasn't stormed out, honestly. Maybe she's too shell-shocked.]

[sleepytimegal]

Oh no, I feel bad 'cause this whole situation's horrible and I've done some pretty bad things too? [ A little sarcasm there, but- ] So I don't think of you as some kind of monster for not considering. I think most of us considered at one point or another.

[heritrix]

You should still think of me as someone capable of being your enemy for it. That's just the facts.

[Considering is different from trying, after all. But she went about things a little strangely, so she doesn't bother reminding Alex of that again. If it had gone wrong, though, in a sense it could have been like that.]

The way I planned it out, I didn't think there would be a trial, but if it had gone wrong there would have been.

[sleepytimegal]

...Huh? That's...but how? It doesn't seem like they'd let you do that.

[heritrix]

[She makes a little hmphing sound, like she sees Alex's point. Rin did say before, in hindsight she thinks her plan was more desperate than clever.]

I wasn't thinking about that at the time. I don't think it would work now.

[She shakes her head.] At the time, though I couldn't decide who to kill. I wasn't getting anywhere finding a way out either, so that's when a different thought occurred to me. So long as someone dies, your secret wouldn't be shared, right?

[Simple as that. She turns the figurine over in her hands, careful not to leave fingerprints.]

So I definitely had to kill someone. But what if after that person died, they were resuscitated?

[If they died, two weeks ago her logic insisted it should count, but if there's no corpse there's no trial. It felt like the perfect solution.]

[sleepytimegal]

...Then...

[ That is a good point. Alex can't help think that she's been here for too long, though, because already she's going off in directions of "but what if a body has to be discovered for the rule to be enacted" or something of the like. Still, it sounds like a valid loophole. ]

...then maybe you'd have a way around all of this. So- you tried to do that but it didn't work, or...you changed your mind?

[heritrix]

It's the kind of strategy that needs two people. Instead of the person I was expecting however, someone barged in uninvited.

I couldn't make myself try a second time after that. It wouldn't work with that one, and I... [Her mouth tightens as she glances uncomfortably towards the closet.] I didn't want to.

[sleepytimegal]

[ There's a very long moment of silence, there, as Alex tries to decide which question to ask. The moment feels long to her, at least, and it probably does to Rin too. ...There's a hissing in her head, but she ignores it. She's getting used to ignoring it. ]

Was... It was hard enough to get ready one time, is that...it?

[heritrix]

[Rin shakes her head.]

It was easy. [Her laughter is quiet, and watery.] It wasn't until after my hands shook, or I felt afraid. A-And—

[Her words are cut off with a noiseless sob; a sound she keeps trapped in her throat. Every thought that passed through her head in the aftermath can't fit into a single emotion, or a single sentence. That was the scary part.]

[sleepytimegal]

Hey.

[ Alex's voice is soft. She stands and...hesitantly approaches. ]

It's okay. You don't have to say anything you can't.

[heritrix]

[Rin's posture straightens, as if to say say she'll be fine, just give her a minute. But her shoulders shudder not a second after, tears splashing off the crystal figure she holds and off to her thumbs. She takes a corner of her pajama top and tries to wipe it clean.

Maybe two minutes.]

[sleepytimegal]

[ Alex doesn't reach out to her. But she stands by the desk. ]

It's okay. [ Softer. ] Take all the time you need.

[ It's only fair. ]

[heritrix]

[With her figure nestled safely in her lap and the pajamas as cushioning, Rin draws up her feet onto the chair, so she can hug her knees close to herself, and lets her forehead drop down. When she speaks again, her words are a little muffled for it.]

This is only the second time I've been backed into a corner like that. [At the time it felt like the first, but still. Throat thick, she can speak, but her voice shakes slightly.] I thought I had a handle on it. But then you said what you did, and I felt depressed all over again.

[Maybe she wasn't doing as well as she thought, if that's all it took. Maybe she really was just bottling it up.]

[sleepytimegal]

You gotta let yourself feel things. Especially...in this place. If you don't, then... It'll just keep getting worse, Rin.

[heritrix]

[Rin shakes her head; raises it a bit to peek over her knees.]

It's not as hard for me as it is for the rest of you.

[It's hard to tell how much of this is truth from fiction. She's watched every execution closely, without looking away. Every death has disturbed her, but not with shock. Until today, none of the deaths really affected her, but even then she was able to get close to both Tabby and Sigrun's bodies.

...Rin's not a normal girl. She's very aware she's not a normal girl, and that makes situations like this so much harder.]

I don't usually bottle things. When I'm sad or angry, I'm able to handle it on my own, and I trained my whole life for a situation like this. So the things that bother you won't bother me, and vice versa.

If it's a problem, I try to fix it quickly. [Wiping her face with her sleeve, she laughs a little, and it's not unpleasant.] Shirou told me once I get my regrets out of my system, I pay everything back twice over... But I don't know how to do that here.

[Even Archer... Once they'd walked home, she'd been able to come up with a plan of attack that very night. Here she has a rough one, but there's nothing she can do until she's home. If she can make it home.

She can't think of a single time she's been unsure of her path before, or so helpless.]

[sleepytimegal]

...Yeah, this place is kind of an exception in a lot of ways... I... Maybe exploring, or investigating? How do you get it out normally? When you've got the freedom to...do things?

[ Alex figures the best way to help Rin is to figure out something for her problem. Maybe, at least. She speaks gently, but with purpose. ]

[heritrix]

...depending on the problem, whatever's fun, or most productive. My investigations have had zero pay-off so far, I'll admit. I'm not going to give up, but I just wish I could find something.

[sleepytimegal]

I...understand that. I- I wanna find something too, to do something and help. But it doesn't mean you're... I don't know, useless. You help us out a lot, in trials or...just I dunno...talkin' last week. I know that probably doesn't help, but, um...I wanna find something to help.

[heritrix]

[Rin tries to think of the things she likes; what is and isn't available to her with the limitations they have here. Maybe it's because of what they discussed earlier, but the first thoughts that come to mind isn't her usual solo activities, but her daily high school life.]

Maybe we can just... Talk about normal things. I miss pretending to be normal.

[sleepytimegal]

...I think that's something I can help with. It...seems like something I'd really like too.

[heritrix]

That might be something to try then. [Rin sniffs, wiping at her nose before managing a small, watery smile.] Thanks, Alex.

[sleepytimegal]

[ She smiles and...very lightly bumps Rin's shoulder with her fist. ]

Don't worry about it. That's...what friends are for, right?

1/3

[heritrix]

[...Alex would consider her a friend?]

2/3

[heritrix]

[There's a bubbling feeling in her chest as she raises her head, and she can feel her cheeks heat up. Glancing away, then back to Alex again, the ensuing redness will be mistaken for her crying earlier if she's lucky.]